You’ve gotten engaged and picked a date. Now you have to start planning the big day. There are many free wedding planning checklists and budget trackers. But even with all the helpful resources and tools, the process can still seem overwhelming. Where do you start? Here are some tips for determining what’s most important to you and your future spouse.
Look at what you remember the most from other weddings you’ve attended.
Do you love flowers and notice them every time you attend a wedding? Perhaps you are into music and dance the night away at every event you attend.
Does your fiancé comment on the photos the photographer posts on Facebook after the wedding? Or maybe your fiancé was really hungry at the wedding of his third-cousin-once-removed and he doesn't want to repeat that “hangry” situation.
Maybe you both notice when a wedding is made up of a close group of family and friends who genuinely enjoy the day, it doesn’t matter how much is spent. There are usually certain aspects that will stand out to you and your fiancé when you attend other people’s weddings.
List your favorites separately and compare notes.
Discuss the top three items that are most important to you and your fiancé. They may be different, or you may be fortunate enough to have identical or overlapping lists. Whatever the situation, talk about each item until you have your top three as a couple. This may require some compromise, but it’s good practice for marriage. Don’t end with a list that is all “his way” or “her way.” It should be “our way.”
Now you have a list. That’s great! So, what do you do with it?
Your time and budget should focus on the items you thought were most important. The rest will come together eventually, and some things may prove not to be very important in the end. This doesn’t mean that you have to spend half your budget on the dress, flowers and photography. But it does mean that you prioritize these items when choosing what to do. If there is a question of sacrificing something from the master list, it won’t be one of these items.